Tattered Gray Shadows

memories of all the good times

fewer stories, oft-repeated

the tie that binds when the cord is cut

obscene tirades not remembered

the great old oak that roots the clan

at last upturned with roots exposed

one who has known you for all of your days

more demanding than your child

that person once so very active

that man now lying in his own wastes

keeper of what they used to say

simply entranced by TV games

happy model for our golden years

unlikely plans for resuming life

one who helped you when you were helpless

you cannot really help her now

he who, smiling, made it look so easy

now you find you have no answers

lives of dignity and quiet virtue

ignored by strangers at their day jobs

strong men who fought in the greatest war

gray shadow struggling to sit up for dinner

enjoying a life of wise contemplation

lying awake in a confusing silence

doing things there was never time for

squirming over bedpans and suffering from bedsores

spending time with the grand kids

frightened children at a stranger’s bedside

passing on rich memories and great lessons

mementos committed to the dumpster

secure enough after a life spent saving

nest egg plundered by corporate health care

skills for living honed and sharpened

quiet desperation among real strangers

committed forever to a soul partner

left alone to sort out the tatters

enjoying a healthy, active lifestyle

watching their bags fill through tubes

making plans and talking trips

but riding everywhere on their backs

watching fat and getting fiber

eating dog food to stay on budget

seeing the grand children growing up

mistaking your daughter as her child

wisely tending to the household

being fleeced by thieves and cons

passing away with quiet dignity

bilked one last time by the funeral ‘industry’

Faux-Golden Years

For now I am ready to retire and become that cute and cuddly grandpa

But my prostate has swelt up like an orange and I need that quintuple bypass

I wish to take my time now and to stop and smell those lovely roses

Yet I am 30 pounds overweight and my blood pressure is way too goddamn high

I look forward to the things I worked so much for all those long, hard years

But I have lost my hair and my back just plain hurts me every day and all the time

I plan to see all those places I have only dreamed of during all my work-filled life

However, I cannot walk, even quite slowly, without wheezing and turning red

I want to take some time to sort things out and make a bit of sense of it all

But my memory fails rapidly and I find simple explanations really are the best

I look forward to great adventures in the freedom of the open road

I poke along in my bloated RV between those safe, costly and sterile campgrounds

I finally get to spend some time with my family and my grandchildren

Turns out I don’t really care for them and they don’t have much time for me

I am excited to make new friends and live a rich and rewarding social life

I wear little diapers because I leak a bit after each of my 15 daily pees

I want to travel lightly, looking for excitement, like I did so long ago

I go nowhere without several pairs of glasses and all of my prescription meds

I collect my thoughts and refine my experiences into a unique vision of my own

I am viewed as a simple dodderer, quite inconsequential and totally irrelevant

I will finally spend some time communing with nature and learning of myself

Hopefully, my hearing aid does not feedback too loudly or have its battery go dead

I plan to hike to the many places I have noticed driving by, where people never go

My cardio and knees are simply gone and I tire quickly in the grocery store

I will hit the hot spots and go to all the famous beaches

Laws may have to be passed to keep my ugly body safely hidden from public view

I hope to gain a new perspective regarding our lives and our times

The world moves so fast around me I just want to keep out of its way

I will stand up for my rights with the others of my storied generation

I mean to attend those creepy Day of the Living Dead demonstrations

I can spend my time helping teach the children to know right from wrong

I am just another body to be looked after, according to their teachers

I try blending in, but my wrinkles and my thin white hair set me far apart

People blow right by me though I walk just as fast as I deem it sensible

I can easily fall asleep by friends and family with my mouth lolling open

If I have a good bowel movement I judge the day to have been a pretty good success

My thin and shiny skin has large dark blotches in among the spreading wrinkles

My yellow toenails get cut twice a year whether I can see them or not

I love getting out of doors and riding in a golf cart while smoking a cigar

I prefer eating dinner at 4 pm to avoid any indigestion when I try to sleep at 9

I talk to people I haven’t seen for years but they look at me quite strangely

Each new diagnosis yields a flood of flattering attention that brings meaning to my life