He Rides With Me

He rides with me

          Long bony fingers rest lightly upon my shoulder

He stands behind me

          He casts a shadow upon me even under noonday sun

He takes rest with me

          He reeks of the earthy smell of my own decay

He laughs with me

          He sees my toothless skull beneath the sandy soil

He looks at me

          From somewhere within my dying father’s eyes

He comforts me as he holds me close

          when I can no longer bear the pain

He waits with patience for me

          While my short moments come to pass

He drinks with me

          And he helps me to see how old you know I have become

He trains with me

          As I prepare to take him on

He believes in me

          And truly I can never fail him

He flees with me

           We look back for him together

He stays with me

          Always just a careless moment from leaving for good

He prays with me

          With his toothy grimace, ever unchanging

He closes his hollow eyes with me

          In case the bell should toll while I sleep

He reminisces with me

          His dry cackle sending the noisy crows into the air

He takes to the road with me

          As we seek the kindness of some good soul to bury me

He rolls the dice with me

          Someday those grinning snake eyes will come up at last

He gives thanks with me

          For without life he does not exist

He takes chances with me

          But never does he lose his grip upon my naked soul

He grows careless with me

          And he lets me make it easier for him to do his job

He grieves with me

          And his tears are as cold as any November rain

He forgets with me

          Yet through dreams he always keeps in touch

He smells the Spring with me

          Even as we rest alone in the darkness of February

He rages with me

          But there is no rage to be found within him

He breathes with me

          And every single breath reduces my precious finite store

He believes with me

          Without any wavering from the goal that we share

He grows fatigued with me

          And his shadow increases in its length and darkness

He wastes time with me

          For to him it is indeed just the same

He gasps for air with me

          Thereby gaining more of his real voice

He absorbs the world with me

          As he prepares to begin my sifting back to the earth

He goes to war with me

          Soundlessly he greets those with my brothers

He answers the call with me

          Steadying my gait upon this pre-ordained path

He contemplates forever with me

          Yet he is but the mute doorman to the void

He is frightened with me

          But he whispers that soon I will fear no more

He tells lies with me

          Only laughing out loud when I lie to myself

He stumbles off to sleep with me

          My snoring and my mumbling help him to frighten children

He fades away with me

          Until my bones are bleached so white and very pure

He stays at home with me

          Quiet and clean until my time has come

He struggles for life with me

          And in the end he is there beside me

He makes deals with me

          Somehow I miss the details just like all the others

He asks for mercy with me

          For she is, after all, his saintly sister

He views the microcosm with me

          His hand ever upon me, watching their lives play out

He grows pale with me

          But for him, it is a sign of increasing strength

He makes foolish mistakes with me

          Just to illustrate how close he always remains

He reeks of life just like me

          Maybe a little more damp but very earthy

He sits up with me

          Staring into the dark with those huge empty eyes

He drives too fast with me

          His grip ever tightening upon my shoulder

He helps himself with me

          And he might envy all the fat that he will never have

He watches the sunset with me

          Our dusty smiles and tattered looks, one and the same

He heads off alone with me

          Always just as close as that last mistake

He smiles with me

          For he is always grinning, in any case

He kisses ass with me

          It is the kiss of death no matter what

He finds time with me

          Just the same he counts the knots every day

He loses consciousness with me

          Knowing all the while if it will return

He blasphemes with me

          Laughing at the slightest unease that I might feel

He gets quite sick with me

          Finding my feverish ruminations entertaining

He fucks with what I call my soul

          But that is neither his real job nor his true purpose

He slays the enemy with me

          And together we watch ourselves lay down til I die

He finds fault with me

          Shrieking with inner joy at the life that’s left within me

He wanders aimlessly with me

          Every stop a ticket punched on my chosen route

He stands in the rain with me

          Our dirty clothes all wet in the shadow of a rainbow

He fears the unknown sounds of the night with me

          My anticipation seems to draw him nearer

He performs one routine task after another with me

          A monotony of boredom before my delivery to the emptiness

He sees all this suffering with me

          His whispers of the causes and the meaning, I never quite hear

His vision fades with mine

          As the grasp I only thought I had upon the world grows ever weaker

He stands shivering in the snow with me

          But he is ever so much colder without any flesh

He pays back debts with me

          And in the end I still owe him everything

He becomes lost in thought with me

          But those brief moments are deducted just the same

He strays off course with me

          Yet the path we take remains just as straight

He makes friends with me

          During that brief interval between the ashes

He performs unspeakable acts with me

          Faithful witness to any heinous crime

He ignores advice with me

          Howling madly at the moon as we lurch along our way

He finishes jobs with me

          Every motion just one more decision that cannot be undone

He bites feeding hands with me

          But there is no joy within him from my folly

He watches others pass away with me

          Silent and alone, his emptiness fills my thoughts

He stays far away with me

          But no matter where I roam, where I am going always stays as close

He casts down his eyes and I am grateful

          As some kind soul digs my small place

He works through the pain with me

          My age a weight that slowly increases my burden

He fears for the safety of my loved ones with me

          Never losing sight of the next possible random life changing event

He evolves from dust to dust with me

          No simple journey but certain just the same

He waxes and wanes from ashes to ashes with me

          And it is not like he has never been there before

He gazes fixedly with me

          Wondering how I could have forgotten our noble cause

He founders and fails with me

          Knowing that I reach his goal under all possible scenarios

He considers the devil with me

          Not explaining what I will only understand when he shows me

He questions god with me

          But his job is finished before my nails stop growing

He feels immortal as much as me

          For he cannot realize that he, too, must perish when life is no more

He looks directly into the sun with me

          Still, no light can penetrate those empty sockets

He frolics by a fantastically colored sea with me

          He is so sober he never knows that he is stoned

He bears witness with me

          His mute testimony forever ignored by the righteous

He stops passersby with me

          They sense our closeness and try to get away

He seeks the eternal with me

          But he cannot know that some day he too will have no more work