That Good Black Light

Verily, I always have that soothing black light off the eternal emptiness deep inside to comfort me

That universal darkness is so secure and everlasting: My silent faith is as a featureless black monolith

Though my eyes were closed and my optic nerve severed, I would still perceive its blank perfection

I am utterly unable to be disappointed given the absolutely empty oblivion which I know awaits me

That wondrous and everlasting truth remains likewise blacker than anything my eyes can ever see

This good black light envelops their fairytale brightness that threatens to well up within me

I shine my black flashlight on all those unpleasantries that I really don’t want to have to perceive

I keep my black headlights on low beam to narrow my focus which really helps calm my fears

The royal coat of arms of my beliefs is that gaping black hole at the center of our galaxy

For, yea, all that endlessly increasing and irreversible darkness is the cornerstone of my faith

Totally devoid of any purpose or promise: Purest achromaticity simply has no way to ever fail me

Colorless, silent, empty, and consciousless: It draws me back, to diffuse me to nothing, forever

Assured of resting almost without motion, I will regain the universal standard of near absolute zero

I await with a true faith my certain return to the everlasting, unified formless from which I sprang

Black light shall always illuminate the empty dream during my eternal sleep without any awakening

Blessed with the absolute certainty of the inescapable, feature-free timelessness, I can rest at ease

Secure that I will never know any boundaries since I cannot ever again require any space at all

So briefly swept together to the top of this black tsunami, so soon to tumble back alone into its abyss

Maybe enough time to internalize the darkness before I am once again homogenized within it

I’m freed from their false choices regarding the multitude of worn-out and bogus, one-true-saviors

The infinite, conscious-free emptiness will instantaneously absorb and totally dilute my phony soul

The effects of my puny actions will hyperbolically approach nothing throughout whatever eternity

And the void already stands limitless - outside this one, always-expanding current universe

Philosophical arguments blow away with evaporating logic, imagination, thought and memories

I am assured of complete equality with all my brothers – criminal, rich, powerful, crippled or poor

Nothing makes no promises nor seeks any false bargain for the worthless faith of my fictional soul

The black is so much cleaner than their smoke, costumes, ceremonies, props, legends and lectures

I await an absolutely smooth and pointless, totally insensate and memory-free eternal peace

Don’t have any lavishly embellished myths or inane fictional heavens to appease my childish fears

I content myself with the promise of a conscious-free infinity, passing beyond my absent notice

And god’s so-called messengers here on earth are but transparently-comedic hustlers to me

Don’t have to choose to mortgage my fictional soul so I, too, never fret over attaining paradise

Praise be to that black light off the non-cognitive and permanent emptiness where I truly belong

But, I am no atheist given my absolute and unshakeable faith in my onrushing, permanent oblivion

For, indeed, I do believe in a totally peaceful, if un-sensed, eternity - without any wants or needs

Count me among the faithful for I firmly accept that the everlasting oblivion awaits us all

Just Leave Me Be Right Here

The Dog Tag from where I lay

This is my chosen place

I get the good winter sun

This was not an accident

And it is not a crime scene

Please to leave me be

I do not bother anyone

The crows are done with me

And now I bleach my bones

Let me be alone with my peace

This place is not on the map

I came here on my own

I mean to stay for good

Don’t need an investigation

Don’t want no death certificate

Don’t got any next of kin

Go away, I’m busy listening

I am not even trespassing

My taxes are all paid up for good

This stuff is biodegradable

I don’t make any noise

I came here on my own

No one else is responsible

I have no other home

This is where I want to be

Got no affairs to settle

The snow don’t bother me

I don’t light no fires

And I’m not camping here

Smile back at me

Look into my empty sockets

Do not bury me

Leave this note upon me

Turn my skull to the light

This is how I want to fade

Go on and get away now
And please just leave me be

Finding My True Place In The End

Take a deep breath, at least one of the molecules entering your lungs came from Caesar's last breath. Enrico Fermi

There will still be a place for me amid the inorganic and the inanimate

Taking part in the complex cycles of the atmosphere here on earth

Cycling with the moon as she waxes and she wanes

Flowing with the tides in steady and peaceful respirations

Falling with the gentle rain from clouds of mist above the valleys

Crashing on a rocky shore with no one there to see

Carried upon the wind that always blows across the southern ocean

Inhaled by the plants in one form and respired in another

Circulating deep within the ocean around the globe for many centuries

Exposed with the dancing motes of dust backlit by a shaft of sunlight

Thrust up with the mountains built during vast tectonic plate collisions

Flowing with many different rivers through long inter-glacial epochs

Glowing with the northern lights in the star-filled Antarctic sky

Part of me in the rolling dawn and sunset that travel around the world

Ingested by the plant eaters and left behind to nourish wildflowers

Breathed in by living organisms to become part of them as well

Reacting in the upper atmosphere with the sunlight that sustains

Escaping into the quieter reaches where the planet’s gravity is not measured

Subducted down below the earth’s crust to flow up again with the liquid magma

Part of some few molecules in certain raindrops of every passing storm

Refracted briefly in a rainbow visible from one empty spot on the desert floor

Locked for centuries in the bogs or for millennia in coal deposits

Merging with the sun when it grows to claim us in its old age

Rippled by the passing of the cosmic background energy

Falling as snow and merging with the icecap for a thousand centuries

Rising with the smoke of countless burning fires

Riding with the earth around the sun, through the milky way, across the universe

Part of the biology of your sorrow and the chemicals released in your laughter

In one layer of stone finally exposed once more to the morning’s light

Helping conduct the voices of the birds and the calling of the insects

Freezing up as winter darkens, gliding down with the falling leaves

Blind chemicals from me reacting in someone’s creation of a work of genius

Consciousless but swirling, in those patterns perceived only by the living

Busy with the cycles of the inorganic and the radiations of the life force

Part of me was part of them and will be part of you as well as all of this

Like time to a stone

like the long spring twilight so slowly fading but not quite ending

          the dark winter's night without any real beginning

like the endless school year when we were still young children

          time, to a stone, as it is ground into sand by a stream

like the trees never growing though seen every day

          the changes on our own faces, so difficult to notice

like the loss which hurts less often than it did at first

          the future that contains us knowing only one direction

like the threads that lie scattered without cause or effect

          the lines of our lives flow then end, with no change in pressure

like the volcanic islands which arose, flourished and were swallowed

          the constant roar of the ocean as it is pounds away on a shore

like the day of the year which shifts light into dark

          the memory of a lonely figure fading off into a dusk

like the smallest of details which plagues one for long years

          the certainty of our passing can never quite be ignored

like the vision that visits in time of our greatest need

          there is this mute summons served without any notice

like the confusion that we sense at the center of so many things

          comes a slow perception that quietly aids in our adjustment

like the fearless zeal of those who know very little

          the honesty of children which cannot be ignored

like the brief moment we spend as ourselves on this blessed earth

          our un-measurable fraction of all of time grows ever smaller

like the two atoms fusing brightly in a far-off star

          the smallest cause can bring about the biggest change

like the simplest ideas that transform entire societies

          only the best teachers can explain all things to their children

like the way that details appear when one walks upon the land

          the faster we can go the less we are able to notice

like the myriad drops forming a river that’s now lost in the ocean

          those experiences unfolded into someone we had known

like the way the dawn ends so very quickly

          the morning builds quite slowly and then disappears

like the distance light travels while we are sleeping

          the multiverse measures our allotment with utmost precision

like the strain in our voices that was never there in the past

          the stranger with failing eyes shuffling up to the mirror

like the end of the day as we finally drift off into sleep

          the journey of the dying is taken alone, by one and by all

like the time that you wake up not a child anymore

          the days of our wisdom pass quickly in a dimming of our senses

like the home only dreamed of and the childhood but imagined

          the long distant future is as empty for any as for all of the others

like the many days so far gone that we have forgotten when we forgot them

          the unknown we emerged from lies infinitely open before us

like the things which once moved us and the songs in our hearts

          a quiet contemplation becomes a means to our end

like the far distant stars which move but little no matter our puny time frame

          things pass so quickly for so long and then comes nothing more

like the years passing by ever faster than we can grasp them

          the volume of uncertainty increasing geometrically

like the jagged lightning, we are hurled to the earth

          the endless days that follow leave but a random pile of pearls

like the holy blue planet in whose shallows we bathe in the light

          the darkness eternal surrounds while enfolding us into long night

like the countless tiny creatures with crucial lives to attend to

          the nearness of the emptiness spurs us on to but small actions

Pilgrimage To Infinity

It’s a long journey that I will not be taking

          It’s a big trip for which I do not need to pack

There are far-off destinations that I won’t ever see

          There are wondrous times coming that I will never know

There are uncounted eons past of which I have no memory

          There shall follow infinitely more, all just the same to me

It’s a long journey I am not undertaking

          It’s a trip lasting forever, leaving without me

It’s a pilgrimage to infinity which I make as unrelated molecules

          It’s the bonfire of the life force in which I sparked so briefly

There is wondrous beauty on billions of worlds I cannot know

          There are fascinating creatures that I will never catalogue

It’s a great journey I prepare not to be a part of

          It’s the only real voyage, but I must leave the group

Just as I fall aside so does our kind become separated

          Just as I am remerged so must this species re-enter the void

It’s an omni-directional profusion I will no longer observe

          It’s a hopeless sacred struggle in which we all must simply perish

It’s an epic journey in which there are no chapters named

          It’s a nonsensical contradiction to entropy and darkness

There is no knowable destination on this personal voyage of discovery

          There are endless connections whose richness I will not feel

Just as gravity lessens with distance, so fade my actions over time

        Just as some functions never quite reach zero, our influences must ever remain

It is a great river that casts us to the shore and moves on without malice

          It is necessarily more than just oblivious to my brief awareness

It’s a long journey in even the least promising directions, all at once

          It’s a trip with temporary passengers and no conscious destination

         

It’s a long journey that I won’t be taking but there is nowhere that I might remain behind

In Just A Few Billion Years

In a couple of billion years what you have done is still not going to matter

After the sun grows cold and has long ago given off its last photons

Well after our star has swallowed this blue planet in a thrombolitic swelling

When the last geological epoch ended much earlier in an unrecorded history

Even the last fossil has long since disappeared without a trace

And our succoring atmosphere escaped sometime in some distant past

In just a few billion years all the ripples from your thoughts merge into nanonymity

Death will no longer have a presence in our solar system

And I just bet you will still be up there relaxing in heaven with jesus and mohammed…

After the milky way has grown old and merged with other galaxies

When the life force no longer travels with our beloved Sol

Our earlier history can still be seen from several billion light years away

In a couple billion years all your rules will be long in their rightful places

Forever after the oceans boil away, the story of life on earth goes untold

Our shallow graves have been vaporized for human eons no one counted

Universal truths, discoveries and morals wait unused and without volition

When any injustices inflicted have long since had nothing to affect

The grace achieved from suffering gave way to the yet organic but now interstellar

In a few billion years our collective unconscious shares no memories

Probing life forms cannot discern the slightest trace of our existence

All our trash is at last truly recycled and diffused to the density of outer space

Long after the subjective ceases and the objective is no longer measured

The life force blossoms sentience once again for other creatures to briefly ponder

And you watch it all from somewhere off in a gloriously painted baroque heaven…

In a couple billion years, geo-years will disappear as the earth ceases to orbit

Time can be marked for a while by the dead sun’s journey round our galaxy

Unceremoniously our foolish actions and beliefs evaporate and attenuate

Our chaotic signals diffuse across space, merging with the cosmic background

And all the information that we ever had is still there - but quite still and unknown

Lo, after uncountable universes come and go you still dwell in that gilded heaven…

In a few billion years our effects will cease rippling the cosmic pond forever

The inexorable march of entropy renders our miniscule labors moot

And all of this can be sensed in the space between these two simple breaths

The Beckoning Void

to say good night and wish goodbye

          to give thanks to all and pay respects

to slip out quietly beneath the stars

          to join once more with that magic void

to part as friends and go our ways

          to leave the party very early

to paddle out upon a peaceful sea

          there to slowly cross time’s horizon

to leave each other and those we love

          to find ourselves at home no more

to loose our grasp and free our minds -

          to the dusty cosmic background

to humbly bow as the curtain falls

          to relinquish the observer

to be upon that rider-less horse

          to merely complement the light

to kindly smile to no real purpose

          to leave behind a type of joy

to know the way having never been

          to follow others, but all alone

to fly right out of inner space

          to pass beyond and cast no shadow

to dream no more

          but neither to awaken

to evaporate a lifetime

          a blossom falling from a tree

to leave the bench and slowly walk

          time to join the wind that scatters

Last One Liners

Passed away over coffee on vacation down in Flarida

Were killed when the vehicle in which they were riding

Expired at home surrounded by friends and family

Died later upon the operating table

Resuscitation efforts failed after the rescue

Drowned in bed from lung congestion

Found cool and stiff on the couch next morning

Probably never felt a thing

Succumbed to extensive multi-system trauma

Passed away quite suddenly without any prior history

Died at home after suffering long from the illness

Expired on the pavement from excessive blood loss

Mostly women and children killed in a crush at the famous mosque

Was ejected from the vehicle involved in a rollover

Went into shock and never regained consciousness

Choked to death on a food obstruction following a drunken laugh

Sudden onset while doing yard work, earlier this Spring

Inhaled his own vomit which stopped effective breathing

Darted out in front of a slowly passing car

Taken ill at a family gathering

Hemorrhaged rapidly from a burst aneurysm

Expired alone of unknown causes

Passed away at Good Faith Hospice

Pronounced dead below the embankment

Suffered a coronary during a morning swim

Dozed off and struck a large oak tree

Died from a previously undiagnosed allergy

Ruled an accidental overdose

Became the latest victim of the outbreak

pronounced dead by officials at the scene

expired later from several gunshot wounds

perished in her crib from unknown causes

collapsed and never said another word

struck by a vehicle turning in front of his motorcycle

investigators said alcohol may have been involved

stabbed repeatedly at a holiday gathering

beaten to death outside a liquor store

shot in an apparent robbery attempt

killed in a dispute over a drug deal gone bad

failed to negotiate the curve

names were not released pending notification of kin

conveyed to police Sunday at approximately 3:00 AM

reportedly the victim struck his head

listed officially as Dead Upon Arrival

honored an Advance Directive to withhold any treatment

recovered his body at a depth of approximately ten feet

forced to euthanize the victim’s over-protective dog

driver of the semi was cited for improper equipment

confirmed the killing of the US diplomat

showed signs of an extra-judicial execution

autopsy confirmed she died of strangulation

opened fire at a checkpoint and killed at least sixteen

suspected suicide bomb exploded outside the luxury hotel

One villager was killed and 10 others wounded by grenades

savaged her in a cheap blanket after she was strangled

both murder suspects were wounded and later captured

found unconscious in the apartment and later charged in her death

cause was believed to be a massive heart attack

have been publicly hanged where the bombings took place

suffered from high blood pressure, diabetes and chronic emphysema

cause of death not listed, pending a coroner’s report

following unrest six weeks ago

showed grainy images of the beheading

slaughtered thousands when the disease was confirmed

began again with acute chest pain triggered by chronic stress

died when a hospital lacked the supplies to treat him

What Would You Do

What would you do if you learned it would only be a year

          Could you do everything and then sum it all up, if it were so very near

What if right now you knew you had to leave in just 30 days

        How much would you try to experience and what goals would you raise

Would you find something different in the beauty of every sunrise

          Would you note all the last times like each was good for a prize

Could you possibly place everything in order and be prepared to unwind

          Perhaps you might simply determine to fight and to somehow survive

Suppose that you were convinced you would be dead by tomorrow

          If the colors seemed so much brighter, would that be simply from sorrow

Should you rush about trying to do all the things you had promised

         Or maybe spend time dwelling on something you knew you had missed

Would you consider their memories of you and try to change their tone

          Would you bother to get rid of those many things you still own

Consider that the plane is falling straight down and gathering speed

          How could you prepare yourself in that awful panic, terror and need

How much time would you ask for, if it were forced to be decided

          At that crucial moment, by what principles would you be guided

Would you even bother to watch your beloved TV anymore

          Would you pray for salvation or consider the void as never before

Who would you contact and what might you say

          What affairs would you attend to and which ones would you let lay

What should you do about your children’s future

          How might your spouse do without you to help and to script her

Would you sadly realize that you had wasted so much time

          Would you mainly miss daily actions of the most ordinary kind

Are there those you would tell the things to, that you have always known

          Would you expire inside or outside, far away, or in your own home

Would you keep on working until they carried you away

          Could you remain quiet or would you tell anyone who would stay

Would you turn to religion and let faith be your true guide

          Would you just end it all early and leave the priests feeling denied

Should your family interrupt their lives as you are expiring

          How could they understand the way your neurons are rewiring

Does it make sense to ease your anguish with pain medication and religion

          Why bother to keep up with your physical education

In this strange light, what message would you prepare for your children

          Should you spend money furiously on dreams to try and fulfill them

Would you sleep dark nights through or lie awake counting every moment

          Could you draw any meaning looking back on the blur and the foment

Should you take some time and write out your own obituary

          Does it make sense to fuss around cooking and keep being handy

What activities could possibly sustain you as you counted down to the nil

          Would you donate your organs and finally make out your last will

Would you still strive to keep your lawn well-trimmed and green

          What could you share with your grandson so he would see what you mean

Do you think you could extract some bit of wisdom from where you have been

          If you find ways to maintain will they conflict with what you have seen

What would you do first and what would you try to be doing at the end

          Would you swell hotly with anger and then collapse among friends

Would you choose peaceful narcotic fantasies or the blunt edge of reality

          Could helping others possibly ease the pain of your imminent fatality

Could you consider the fate of everything that you have been taught

          Could you conceive of a universe completely devoid of your own thought

Would you be able to draw any real satisfaction from your old recreations

          Would it help those you hurt if, near the end, you had some revelation

What would you choose to be the last thing that you say

          Who would you have stand by you as you finally slip away

What would you do if you had only a few short years left on this earth

        And how would you react if that time began the instant of your birth

Dozing There Forever In A Single Blink Of Time

silver-haired blind man in a checkered flannel shirt strokes a purring calico tomcat

          both comfortable with that black wool blanket covering his lap

purring calico tomcat soothes the man's rough and work-hardened hands

          as he weighs the value of his long ago against the shortly sure to come

blind man feels the sun through the open window on his craggy face and smiles

          rumbling calico tomcat shifts and switches purring gears

they both enjoy the silence, the peace and tranquility

          they seem so safely anchored in this place and time

clouds but then just passing, stir the petals of a red tulip

          blind man emits a sigh, calico cat unruffled continues on his ride

god looks down upon the blind man staring within himself

          god strokes the purring tomcat just behind his ear

behold the ancient blind man with nothing left to fear

          quite content that calico tomcat lies, very still and very near

silver-haired with flaring nostrils, thickened ears and wrinkled skin

          no good no more for working, cannot bring home any pay

calico cat was born to leisure, sleeping twenty hours every day

          blind man can feel his spots with ease due to different temperatures

silver-haired blind man in a checkered shirt, wise old tomcat in his spotted coat

          dozing there forever in a single blink of time

no more howling at the moon, no more gnashing of the teeth

          silver-haired old blind man considers carefully his each and every move

with the cat upon his lap and the flowers in the garden

          blind man in a small room with a window, on a sunny autumn afternoon

                  

with the help of the cat and the ticking of a clock

          he traces out the warm sun's shadow as it moves across his tidy space